Feminine Lines

           So you wonder why the young girl is so smitten by her boyfriend of a few months and has agreed to marry him? Oh, did I not tell you that he reminds her of her daddy. He does grandiose things once in a blue moon and tells her she means the world to him. Why is this a challenge?           Small consistent acts show your character and commitment. It's not in the big show of acts of love for the world to see that measures your commitment or love. It doesn't mean you can now earn her world. You don't always need to show up as a 'hero'. Just show up frequently as 'you'. Show up with your challenges and perfect imperfections. Real heroes move without superpowers or costumes and it has cost them much more to be diligent. While she may not forget the grand gesture, it has misaligned her expectation in meaningful relationships and represented false masculinity to her. You can't keep up really. You might not be able to give ...

          Don't you think contracts should be signed before people have sex, make love, be intimate? Whatever name you want to call it. If you carry life-giving sperm, pls be rest assured that you can possibly make babies. If you have viable eggs, be rest assured it can not only make a baby, but your eggs might choose to split and make multiple embryos.           All these one chance parents and shotgun wedded couples should diminish. Women that are looking to tie a man down at all cost, he will still give that 'love' to someone else. You will continue to have the burden of doing the work of 2 to keep the relationship, at all cost. Scheming and conniving to achieve what?           Men roaming the earth with no self-control and women giving it up without considering that you may be tied to 'him' forever. There's a place for random floating, 'don't know what to do with my soldiers' sperm. It's called a sperm ba...

When two of your children are fighting God what do you do? I would have them to sit down, I'll ask them to speak, I would ask them to reconcile so that they can both be healed. One cannot be in denial of their wrongdoing and one be willing to reconcile, both must be readily honest, open and available for reconciliation. That is when God can minister to the both of them, and that is when God can bring change and also fill in the gap and that's when healing can finally take place. How can one hide behind the premise of grace and yet still do wrong? If one does not acknowledge this, there cannot be forgiveness and they can't even forgive themselves. You must identify with your wrong to see beyond.  It's hard for someone to apologize when they can't even take ownership for their wrongdoing. They are always waiting for someone else to point it out. They may atimes use their own perspective to deceive themselves. God would normally draws His children together if bo...

Parents are our first love, we trust them instinctively . They are our safety net and everything that comes with a child's naivety. This trust is usually rubbed away by a series of events that erode it to degradation and despair and sometimes suicide in the worst-case scenario. Why does a parent not trust a child when a child simply trusts a parent, especially when they are vulnerable or in a vulnerable place. You wonder why as parents you hear things about your children from outside your home. As a parent and a child myself, I can identify with both ends of the stick. I struggle with relationships that do not show loyalty or at least maintain it. My child must never ever for a moment doubt that I'll always be on their side. I hope they know it too. As parents, do we create the emotional space for our children to come to us no matter what, with no fear of rejection even when there is a valid reason to? May I submit this for your cerebral musing, most Nigerian parents do...